To Stop or Not To...

When discussing around mindfulness or meditation, most people ask – “Will it silence my mind, will my thoughts stop with mindfulness? 

As a statement, it is both comforting and frightening at the same time. For those feeling stressed out with overthinking or continuous mind chatter, the idea of stopping thoughts sounds to be a great relief. This will also sound quite terrifying at the same time – “What will I do, if my thinking stops?” I think, therefore I am.

But the reality is quite different. The objective of Mindfulness is not to stop our thoughts, it’s to free us from the bondage of thoughts. The two things may sound similar, but each path will lead us into completely opposite directions.

Putting the Lid On

Let’s look at what happens when we try to stop the thoughts. An effort to stop thinking is a forceful suppression process. Thoughts do not come from anything external, but originate inside us. Any effort to stop thinking will just stop the thoughts from showing up, but thoughts will keep brewing and multiplying inside. 

It is like putting lid on a pot of boiling water. The vapors will keep coming up, but the lid will suppress them inside the pot. But how long can we suppress these vapors. At some point either lid will break or the pot. When we suppress our thoughts or emotions, we run into the same risk.

But We Still Wish...

There is no tool which can delete these ever-growing chain of thoughts or stop this process.

Though, we do try to do that temporarily. We switch on the TV and for hours just keep browsing channels, without actually watching anything. Now we browse whatsapp messages. People use caffeine, smoke, alcohol, drugs to suppress the anxiety and thoughts. But we know that these tools suspend the thoughts for a short period – once the effect is gone, the thoughts are back with even higher intensity.

It's a Dead-End!

Mindfulness or meditation will also not help here. There is no way which can stop the process of thinking.

And, actually there is no reason why would we want to stop thinking. Thinking makes us a ‘superior living being’ and has shaped the world we see around. Without thinking, we might be roaming in the jungles, as any other animal.

So, if thoughts should not be and cannot be eliminated, what should we do about our mind chatter?

Me-Thought or My-Thought?

Let’s first understand our problem with thoughts. While we all know that thinking is a great tool given to us and without it we would be non-existent - we seem to have lost control over it. The mind-chatter does not stop, even if we ask, order, request or persuade it. This mind chatter makes us take unwanted roller-coaster rides of anxiety, fear, worry, stress, anger and so on. Whatever we try to do, the mind keeps running here and there, distracting us and shattering our focus. It just does not care about what we want. It has its own rules. And we have got exhausted with all this.

It is like we create an intelligent machine to help us out with our work, schedules and preferences. It reminds us when to get up, when to meet someone. It also tell us what all would interest us for reading or viewing. This is all great. But, at some point, we become so dependent on it, that it starts dictating what should we want and what should we think. Look at your mobile phone – looks like we are talking about it.

But imagine a situation, if this machine was fitted inside our head. After a few decades, we actually forget to differentiate between our own thoughts and machine’s instructions. And we get so comfortable and dependent on it, that our own thought process becomes almost inactive and dull. So this machine starts controlling everything. Now as this machine speaks or suggests or persuades, we believe it to be our own voice.

This is what has happened with the machine called ‘brain’. This machine was gifted to us by nature, but gradually it has become so dominant that we have lost our real voice. Now, the thoughts control us – and we have absolutely no control over them. Just close your eyes for two minutes and watch for yourself.

So..

So what should we do? Let’s look at what mindfulness or meditation philosophy says about it. In mindfulness, the objective is not to destroy this machine or to stop this machine. This is a great machine. The only problem is that it has become autonomous and is now making us dance based on its whims and fancies. The objective is to regain our control and put this machine back to the right, efficient and appropriate use. Therefore, mindfulness is not about stopping the thinking process, but about breaking the bondage of thoughts.

Let’s see how does it work.

Beyond Thoughts...

Imagine we are in a flight passing through the clouds. The visibility gets impacted. The aircraft also gets shaky sometime. As we look out of the window, we can’t see anything. We are in a no-clarity zone. After some time, the aircraft moves up. We can now see the clear sky and space around. we may think that clouds have disappeared, but as we look down, we can see these same clouds below. The clouds still exist, but these are no longer obstructing the vision or creating confusion.

The same thing happens with the thoughts. As we continue to be surrounded by thoughts – we call it analysis – we continue to be confused and unsure. So, what do we do? We collect more information and analyse it in more details. What happens then? We get more confused – analysis-paralysis!

Thinking - The New Way

We don’t realize that there is an alternative way of thinking. Here we rise above the thoughts and start observing them, like these are passing on the screen or as they are clouds passing below the aircraft. 

This may feel quite strange in the beginning. We have become so much associated with the thoughts, that we find it difficult to detach from them and look at them without getting involved. Most of the time, we are either running after an attractive thought or running away from apprehensive thoughts. But a little practice can be of great help here.

Just the act of observing the thoughts gives back the remote control to us. It begins to break the control thoughts exercised on us. It helps us to regain the power to use this tool rightly. Rather than judging the thoughts, getting attached to them or resisting them, we would be able to utilize them appropriately. This control also opens up the channels of creativity, besides substantially reducing stress and emotional agitation.

The science of observing thoughts or emotions or actions or situations or other people is the science of mindfulness. While it sounds very simple to just rise above and start observing, as we go about doing it, we realize that our past patterns are too strong and our consciousness is still dormant. The practice of mindfulness gives the techniques and support for us to take this journey of liberation.